Blessings in the Madness

So life has been super crazy between work and home life and my internet life has gone by the way side. I am trying to balance my work life, home life, and trying to manage my personal me time as well- it is definitely a struggle but i think that i am getting better-especially since i am posting a blog!

Some highlights for the past couple of months are:

We finally found a financial advisor that will help us manage our long term financial goals

JHubby found a job!!!!!!

We had some visitors come out of town to help celebrate my 25th Bday

A major tearjerker, is the passing of my great grandmother at 104 years of age on my mom's bday. I know that she is looking down on me and my family smiling, laughing, and wiping away the tears. I strive to live a life as long as hers, she is my inspiration as she raised my mom and my mom is unbelivably incredible. RIP Gran'ma Clemence XOXOXO

Its Almost Time-Pop Them Babies

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As I get closer to my 25th birthday I have become very reflective- For those of you who dont know personally, this is nothing new- each year rings in with reflective hearts, clean souls, and food to feast.

On the approach of 25 years living on this Earth; from when my mother gave birth to me- I can now truly judge myself and others in my life, learn from the mistakes, and rejoice in the blessing of accomplishments I have received from OUR FATHER.

As It gets closer to my birthday, I think of the Little ONES who were born near or close to 728 and the joy that overtook me (and continues still) when I saw their beautiful eyes, full of HIS love, secure in HIS strength, and sweet in HIS forgetfulness- what an awesome thing and their fabulous diva preggo moms of course!


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I Dont Have to Go Bald!

I am sitting here with my aching feet, watching Dancing with the Stars, and imagining what grown up Me would look like with a fro again. Some of my youtube buddies have taken a comb to their locs and a chopped at least 10 inches of length. For those who are not familiar with locs it is a hairstyle that take years to lock and grow. I have been growing my locks for 7 years and they still had me beat by at least 6 inches! It took 3 weeks to comb out over 100 locs! I will say that it is nice to know that when I do get the nerve to change the hair- which I have promised the Hubby that I would wait until after our first kid- that I don't have to shave my head! I am excited by the possibilities!

CarmellesFabulosity.

Hattnor vs. Pacquiao

There was a sports confusion in our household last night. What to watch:The Bulls vs Celtics or the Hattnor vs. Pacquiao fight?

We chose the Bulls vs Celtics, since they have been bringing the Heat we thought we were in store for a great game that would have us on the edge of our seats . Unfortunately the only Heat we are hopping for now is for the Miami Heat to whup ATL but I digress.... We just finished watching the Pacuiao Hattnor fight and it was no joke! Completely Off the Chain!!!! Pacquiao aint playing!

I cant wait to see what Mayweather will do in response?

Who will be the next victor?

Pacquiao or Mayweather?

CarmellesFabulosity

Does Size Really Matter?

So I am so excited to watch the newest episode of the Game- Derwin finally proposes to Melanie! But here is the thing the rock really isn't that big -especially for a professional football player! But I ask you this does the size of the rock really matter?

I know one lovely lady told her man that the ring he first proposed with wasn't gonna fly, of course she didn't tell him that when he proposed but sure enough the first ring disappeared and was replaced with a larger fabulous one.

As women we dream about the rock, we shop for the rock- often times before we have the Right Man! So would you put a contingency on your I Do? There is so much marketing pushing us into believing the bigger the rock the better the man (and bank- lol)

Well my two cents for you- be more concerned about the size of his heart rather than the rock he proposes to you with!
CarmellesFabulosity

My Fave Shows

Since the economy sucks so bad, the hubby and I have decided (grudgingly so) that we would do without certain luxuries and the first one off the list was cable tv. It has definitely been an adjustment but please know that we are surviving- it can be done! I will admit that it is a struggle when the only conversations people have are based on last night's HBO episode- but we do manage!

You would be surprised at how much more interesting the ccontent is online- to all the people that upload movies, tv shows, and documentaries on youtube, Hulu and Fancast my thanks to you!

Some of the tv shows that we do watch religiously -

Family Guy
The Simpsons
The Game- the hubby doesn't really care for this one-I hope they dont cut the show!
House of Payne
and Bernie Mac

I am all about the laughter!

What are your must watch shows?

CarmellesFabulosity

Let's Talks About It!

I have been married now to my husband for almost seven months and it is great! I am not saying that we don't have our tiffs, but I am strong advocate for marriage. Being a Black woman, I especially feel that Black women should take part in the religious sacrament. The statistics are staggering and appalling of how many Black women go through life without a husband compared to our white sisters. Marriage isn't for everyone - it is a very important life choice and should not be taken lightly as marriage was intended for life. There are many Black women who do want to be married yet are unable to find a suitable mate within in their own race; there are countless reasons, theories, and statistics that explain this phenomena of which I will not be exploring in this post. It is an interesting topic and do suggest all Black women who find that they are directly impacted should research in further detail to understand why this is occurring. Marriage is a deeply personal experience that can have so many psychologoica,l emotional, sprititual, and phsyical benefits. Interracial marriage is no different. These marriages are a controversial topic due to our country's historical race relations that will forever be a part of our past, so interracial couples do find that they have to deal with the approval or disapproval of those around them which can prove to very stressful yet also unifying for the couple. If you dont know about the Lovings- please google them, there story is inspirational and ground breaking as their life is a true testament of dealing with those stresses placed by society. It is crazy that in today's day in age how little most people know about our racial counterparts due to segregation, stereotypical portrayals on mass media -where most people base their perceptions of races from, and just pure ignorance. Throughout this post I will discuss the daunting concerns and different mentalities that I have observed amongst Black women and their potential relationships to white men.

As women, we all have that ticking clock in our uterus and if children are part of your dream for a complete and fulfilling life - well a partner is needed and finding a husband is getting to become a harder and harder task especially when you reside in cities. More women are delaying marriage and childbearing so they can achieve higher education, yet Black women find it increasingly difficult to find Mr. Right in college, and that much more difficult if not impossible in their corporate fields of industry. Many women are finding this to be a strickening reality posing a major roadblock on their path of achieving childhood dreams of marriage. We must make a difficult decision on how important color is. Even though we have gone through life with this very obvious and beautirully blatant color on our skin, we love it, we hate it, we are judge by it- but will we let it stop us from marrying? After surviving the dating scene of NY and Miami my answer was HELL NO!!!!!!

I happily dated, fell in love, and married my white husband acknowledging that true love knows no color. Of course there are cultural differences like his love of rock and roll music and my almost narcissistic relationship with my hair- it is ok to be from a different culture, it enriches our relationships with each other, it makes our bonds stronger and unique. In speaking to and observing different women from friends to strangers about interracial dating/marriage you would be surprised how the color of skin has kept us in awe, silence, and innocently stupid.

There are many ideas that are running rampant about interracial relationships and the top two statements that are made about white men and interracial relationships blow me away! The first one is the hesitation to interracial relationships because of the color of his package. This reasoning is quite common and the most concerning! It is almost a lack of education that comes into play here and I am not really sure where to pinpoint what the time frame is that this information was missed- high school sex ed, teenage girl talk, kindergarten class, I don't know- but it is a real issue! I have heard conversations from the most sophisticated women- from both races- about this. Who cares what color it is - as long as he knows how to pleasure you! However to some women this is enough to discourage dating and marrying outside their race, my advice get yourself a flick and in the comfort and privacy of your abode- watch it and see how little anyone pays attention to the color of his goods. lol


Lastly the notion that all white men have better credit and have jobs so they are better men to marry. Yes when you are choosing your partner these are good things for him to have- good credit, a job, even a car- but to completely generalize the whole race of white men to those attributes is down right absurd!!!! Especially when it is soo easy in today's economy to be employed with good credit and a snazzy ride today and unemployed with questionable credi and on public transportation tomorrow! Yes financial issues play a role in a relationship but once it plays a greater role than the intimacy and affection between the two of you as a couple you are guaranteed to have issues that will make your relationship tumultuous.

There are so many women waiting for that traditional church wedding , wondering if it will happen at all- will they find Mr. Right in time? I encourage women to really take things into perspective and reflect on what the role of a husband will play in their life. As you consider what road to take in choosing your mate- throw color aside and date the man that will make you a happy woman regardless if he wasn't blessed with the same dosage of melanin as you!